


A Taste of Humanity

by QueenStrata (yodepalma)



Series: The Eden Trilogy [1]
Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aziraphale is a jerk, M/M, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Poor Crowley, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 18:24:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1909155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yodepalma/pseuds/QueenStrata
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before the apple, before the storm, before the humans were forced out of Eden, a demon and an angel discovered together that Paradise comes in many forms, even for them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Taste of Humanity

**Author's Note:**

> Old, old fic being reposted for posterity. I feel I should note that Crowley and Aziraphale aren't referred to with gendered pronouns because at this point I wouldn't think they'd actually see themselves as HAVING genders, really. I kind of feel like it comes from spending too much time around humans or in mortal bodies. *shrug* So, yeah, genderless pronouns. For now.
> 
> Also, yes, Crowley is referred to is Crawly. It's totally canon, okay? Nyah. (I originally had it as Crowley and just realized my error, actually.)

"Aziraphale, isn't it?"

The angel in question immediately spun around, a hand placed warily on its sword. It glared as ferociously as it could at the man-shaped being before it.

"It is, isn't it?" the being continued, snake eyes staring eerily at the angel in curiosity.

"Who wants to know?" Aziraphale asked. It tried to sound threatening, but its voice wasn't quite used to such negativity so it sounded more absently annoyed than anything else.

"What does that matter, angel?" the being questioned, eyes sparkling amusedly. "I was just asking a simple question, you know. No need to shoot me down for that."

Aziraphale's eyes narrowed, making it look more or less as if it was squinting against some bright sunlight. The other being grinned and took a couple steps forward, putting itself right in the increasingly annoyed angel's face. It was obviously more amused than frightened.

"Get out of my sight, demon," the angel almost managed to snarl. "The Garden is no place for the likes of you!"

"Then why am I here?" the demon grinned. "Surely if I don't belong here, your precious Lord would kick me out? I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem, would it?"

"You will not speak ill of Him," Aziraphale replied, but what little amount of ill will its voice could muster was gone. Though the angel would never admit the fact, it had often entertained the same thought.

The demon must have guessed that, because its grin widened and its eyes sparkled even more.

"Somebody's been second-guessing ineffability, hasn't he?" the demon said.

"Demon's have no place in paradise," Aziraphale growled, carefully ignoring the truth in its foe's words.

"This isn't quite paradise, angel," the demon laughed.

"Close enough to matter," the angel snapped back. "God created Eden as the perfect place for His beloved creations to exist, and it as close to Paradise than any place on Earth is likely to get. Like it or not, _demon_ , this _is_ Paradise—to Adam and Eve, at any rate. And that's all that matters."

"You want Paradise, angel? I'll give you Paradise!" the demon snarled, putting its hand to the back of Aziraphale's head and tugging it forward until their lips were pressed together. Aziraphale yelped and made to push it backwards, but the demon grabbed both of the angel's hands in one of its own and pulled them away before pushing Aziraphale back, pressing the angel firmly against the Eastern Gate. Its tongue had slipped, purely by accident, into Aziraphale's mouth and it caressed every solid object it came into contact with.

The demon had absolutely no idea what it was doing. All it had thought of when it had come up with the plan was that the humans seemed to enjoy it immensely and that the activity had seemed less than angelic. Of course, it wasn't exactly prepared to go any farther than what appeared to be the basics, but it had been curious as to why Adam and Eve enjoyed the activity so much, and it was absolutely determined to find out.

And it wasn't going to leave Aziraphale alone until its curiosity was sated.

It was quite a while before the demon was anything but frustrated. The angel struggled with all its might, thinking that, while whatever its enemy was doing didn't appear to be particularly dangerous, such proximity with a demon was surely frowned up on and it really couldn't afford to make God angry. Even so, Aziraphale eventually decided that it was not going to get away any time soon, so it might as well give up and just let the demon do what it would—to a point.

When it felt the angel's entire body suddenly slack, Crawly wanted to cheer. But it reigned its emotions in and cautiously let the angel's hands go, prepared to grab them again if the angel wanted to fight. But Aziraphale had absolutely no reaction, so it instead placed its free hand on the angel's back and pulled it even closer.

Soon enough, the angel appeared to get over its shock and respond in the most surprising manner. It wrapped both its arms around the demon and pulled, wanting the additional contact as much as the other did.

The demon found itself moaning, both from the tactile pleasure and from the pleasure of having its curiosity finally sated. It had never in its entire existence felt anything so positively perfect, anything so close to Paradise.

Through the haze that had settled on its mind, the thought that it should say something to Aziraphale popped up. Without quite realizing it, the demon pulled away from the angel, and was only distantly amused when the other followed its lips.

"Thisss iss Paradissse, angel," it purred softly.

Unfortunately for the demon, the hiss that slipped so naturally from its mouth seemed to alert Aziraphale that it was pressed against a demon and was doing something so very sinful that any angel would be at risk of belatedly falling. And so the demon was shocked to find itself being shoved back to the ground by the angel's unexpected strength and it stared up at the other, hurt and confused.

"There are no demons in Paradise," the angel said as firmly as it could, though its voice still shook with an emotion that neither being could fully understand. "That was _not_ Paradise!"

The demon was speechless for a moment. Then, angry, hurt, and frustrated, it surged to its feet in one powerful motion. "Close enough!" it snarled, eyes more narrowed and snake-like than ever before. "It was Paradise for _me_! Isn't that what matters?" There was no response.

And so the demon fled.


End file.
